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“Feels like somebody needs to explain this, so I’ll try: You know the ‘racist family member’ trope? That’s why we have Trump & all the other extreme-rightwing problems in the world.
Yes, really.
…
Simply put: While rampant, deliberate assholery has not been socially policed at all, pushing back against it carries a social death sentence.”
This right here. I’ve experienced this first hand countless times and I’ve been struggling to express it this well for a while now.
@jwcph nails it.
Read the whole thread 
https://helvede.net/@jwcph/114029855409119327
@jwcph To take this further, I wonder how much of the acceptance of the “racist family member” is the fear that were they to confront the worst embodiments of an unfair and unjust system they benefit from themselves, the whole thread might unravel, threatening their own place of privilege within such a society.
In other words, how much of it is the implicit, guilty understanding that they are, themselves, fainter echos of said family member; at once disgusted by what they see in the mirror and yet terrified of the consequences of shattering it?
@jwcph No, seriously, thank you. This is important.
@aral Very much so. Bowing and scraping to the bullies/assholes/insert epithets, is essentially what our government is doing, to the detriment of our multicultural population. Murdoch media courting a wannabe Trump, as new PM, with no regard to the damage that will do. Racism has grown with the encouragement, as has misogyny, and ableism.
@jwcph
@aral I've thought along those lines myself but it doesn't have that much explanatory power here IMO, because of the assholery factor.
It isn't just that this person has uncouth opinions; it's that they're dicks about it & that's clearly part of the point. I think having an actual discussion can get uncomfortable for the reasons you mention - but even then, telling someone who is actively making everyone uncomfortable to pipe down, even politely, shouldn't carry this much social stigma.
@zombiecide @jwcph Yep. I’m living proof of that in the web community.
I'm not sure about the guilt. I think one factor is that the racist is given the benefit of the doubt in the sense that the assumption is that "everyone in this family is fundamentally a decent person” and that their racism is downplayed as merely a flaw. Now we come in and say no, racist uncle Bob is an actual bad person.
@bifouba @aral The thing is, though, that those Assholes are not given leeway for *everything* - if they start throwing their food crumbs at other people, or insult anyone at the table who is NOT a vulnerable minority, you bet they'll be put in their place. You might even get away, socially, with calling them a bad person to their face in this situation.
It's the racist & hateful bigotry, specifically, that gets the overwhelmingly biggest pass.
@aral @jwcph racism and fascism cannot be tolerated nor can be discussed like a normal "point of view". Denying others' rights is at the core of their essence and that process start as soon as you accept to engage with them as you would do with any other point of view.
Ypu don't debate with them, you don't give any space to them. End of the story.
Yes, that is in general what I was expecting to happen but even in sweden it's like "Hmm, he has a point..."
No he does not. Or yes he does but it isn't what you think. I'm too old to listen to tech puppies thinking they are the new world order. We have seen this before and should know where it leads.